Embracing Audacity: Navigating a Quantum Leap into a New Life

I’ve been sitting with this inner rash, an itch that shows up unexpectedly. I asked ChatGPT, am I depressed? It comes one day and leaves the next. I’ve been overwhelmed with a lot—

being in my 30s, being black, being a black woman in America, witnessing teens more successful than me. My feed is inundated with advice on how to date, how to make money, and how to look younger. I wonder, if I were a white woman, would I have been more successful? Would dates treat me better?

One word lingered in the background: audacity. This new life I’ve created requires a woman full of audacity, and I wasn’t showing up as her. Another thought emerged: “But I’m shy.” Yet, if I built this new life, that trait must be there.

I am fighting. It feels like I am fighting. Yet, I also recognize that I’ve been manifesting some of my desires at an alarming rate. That’s when it hit me: somehow, I’ve quantum leaped into this beautiful life, but I don’t know if I’ve done the internal work to be comfortable with what I’ve created. Some traits I once had no longer fit with this new life. I kept asking myself, what do you need? Food? Perfume? These comforts worked temporarily, but the feeling came back stronger.

If you’re going through this weird limbo of adjusting to a new life, it will be a smoother transition once you reflect on the traits you’re giving up and how this new life asks you to show up.

How are you coping with this new life you built? What have you had to shed?